As I sit here with this whirlwind of emotions moving through “me” my heart aches this is a sensation I have become familiar with it aches….for something more….it aches to remember…what it is to feel loved….to pull me back just for a moment….is it all really just a game? Where all the men and women are merely players…?
Why are we all trapped in this crazy matrix…this beautiful Eden…? When really there is no-thing here..at all only space..only stars only pure potentiality….? A figment of our imaginations….our collective imagination?
Why Am I wandering on this path alone..no-body beside me? Where is this body….we are all walking moon and star dust….Knowing there is no-body here…how can anyone ever walk beside me? Vivid imagination…..Surely we are all just walking alone…? All heading in the same direction…..? Home….?
So far no-thing ever worked out with anyone…..apart from my Self….and that’s going really well I think it might last an eternity! I have learnt the most out of this relationship!
Maybe I will never know what it feels like to be truly loved..by another? Maybe Love is too vast and too infinite to be known fully in this experience? In this matrix? I know of a love that exists outside of all boundaries…but love is just a word and it is beyond all words and there is no one there waiting….for anything!
I this heart crys out for the experience of another who like “me” is dedicated to God…..to serve…to service….this is my dream…..it’s all a dream….really…..what’s yours?
I woke in the dream to realise I was dreaming and that this is all dreamtime and in a moment I can get pulled into illusion that this is all real…..and then I remember and then I forget and then I remember…..what madness is this mystery?
I can never forget God and I can never forget Death….my constant companions on this journey….the path laid before me….is not a path I can navigate but rather one that appears as my footsteps move in the direction of love….creating a new path to God….❤ where all shall walk for eternity….
Only One, Only Now, Only Here….only THIS……
Love Love Amelia (DP) ❤